Tired and Uninspired

Funny how I kept all of these old songs on repeat for already a few days straight now. 
I guess I have came to that point again.

The point where I feel completely tired. 

And I want nothing but everything.

Married

I can't really recall the exact words, but recently, a friend of mine updated a status about something like, Menukar status Married di Facebook memang mudah. Tapi realitinya, tidak semurah mana. Yeah even high school kids able to change their status to Divorced and even, Widowed. Seriously, what the fuck? I bet they don't even have the slightest ideas on true relationships, let alone marriage.

Okay, chill. I'm not trying to be emotional or something. But these kids, seriously, are way too spoiled. And just plain dumb. They need a snap-back to reality. Or maybe a snap on the neck will do the work too :P anyways! Let's go back to the main reason I posted up this entry, gaizzz!

Bedroom Sanctuary (Bo Amir Iqram) - Lagu was on repeat as I continued typing the next words HEHE

So just a few days back, my high school friend just got married to the love of her life. I think, they had been in a relationship ever since they were 14, or so. Now, that is something to tell, people! :D I don't really know her, not that I am that ignorant but we never been in the same class, so yeah. Don't hate on me :B anyhow, thanks to Facebook, (and that girl herself for updating) I am constantly informed about her latest feeds :')

Marriage seems like a huge step to me. I am only 20, not yet 21. I doubt that I will be able to hold the title. I can't even be a good student, a good friend, a good daughter, a good artist (*coughs)

And for that, Halisa (if you happened to read this!), you deserve my full respect. All the best for the new life you both are leading and may Allah SWT bless you two, forever and beyond! InsyaAllah.

The End

We are nearing the end. I mean, the semester of course. I don't know. I am only a semester away from getting my scroll. And I have these mixed feelings about everything.

The feeling of not wanting to let go.

The feeling of not wanting to do anything.

I wanna stay at where I am now.

I want this moment to stay.

Damn it. Finishing diploma is like, finishing high school. Or rather Standard 6. You know, when people started to go away. Departures, moving ons. Some might go to boarding schools, some might stay in local high schools. Stuffs like that. As for the high school case, you'll get uneasy feeling that your friends are going away from you.  You people will be separated by states, oceans, continents and shits.

Behold, this is the time when best friends become strangers, enemies are not longer remembered. This is the time where you left everything behind and start over. You get new friends, gain haters and so on.

I don't know. I just, hate changes. Whenever I started to get comfortable with something, it started to change. Like, wearing a new shirt and you're totally fall for it. You planned on wearing it to your favourite class every week and keshing! Shit like, warna pudar sebab rendam lama sangat happened. Yeahh.

So, let's see how I deal with this one. Really.